Hear Kahi, a social worker, talk about building interdependent marriage relationships, and the relationship she has built with God and her husband as they worked through his pornography addiction.
“I have this postcard of a painting. It has become my analogy for a healthy marriage. It’s called “Gently Up the Stream.” It’s two people in canoes and we’re in separate canoes. And they are riding down the river. And they are going in the same direction.
“When I got married, I assumed that we would be “one,” that we would agree on everything and everything would be awesome all the time, and that’s totally not the case.
“So my analogy for what a healthy marriage looks like has changed. For us now, we talk about ‘I’m in my boat, and you’re in your boat. We each have our own boats. And we’re in charge of keeping our own boats in tact. We have to make sure there are no holes, there are no leaks. We have to take take care of our relationship with God and make sure we are whole and healthy on our own and our spouses have to do the same thing. And then, from that point, the goal is that we’re both going in the same direction.'”